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An unexpected spring cleaning

August 29, 2010

I spent most of today deep cleaning my apartment.


At 9:30 this morning, I went into my bathroom to apply my makeup, and I notice a small blackish speck on my ear. I removed the speck and spent a good minute trying to figure out what it was.

I concluded that it was either a) a bed bug or b) a louse (louse = singular of lice)

I’d post pictures, but there really isn’t anything more disgusting than pictures of those two buggers. One glance and your skin starts tingling and you get the urge to scratch your arms. And your scalp.

Needless to say, in the 15 minutes I had before I was to leave my house at 9:45, I tore around, ripping off all the linens, towels, etc from the bedroom and bathroom, shoving them into the washer and blasting them with a hot water wash, not once, but twice today.

See, when I was a kid, I had the misfortune of having had lice. It was a nice way to end a vacation. Thank you airplane seat headrest. That was not a fun experience. It’s also the reason I dislike airplanes.

Also not a fun experience, when my cousin came to visit a year or two later, bringing head lice with her. I didn’t get it a second time (thank goodness), but I had to be subjected to that disgusting shampoo anyway. So gross. I’m not sure there is any other hair care product that smells that horrific.

As for bedbugs, the bed bug registry became my best friend when I was apartment hunting. What is the bedbug registry you ask? It’s website that lists all the apartments or homes that have been cited for bedbugs in a specific city. Trust me when I tell you I ran EVERY potential home through that database, AND I asked potential landlords if there had ever been an issue at that address.

Overkill? Probably. But who wants to deal with bedbugs?!

This afternoon, I came home and vacuumed my mattress, scrubbed my floors, EVERYTHING. My house smells of lemon and vinegar.

A couple hours later, as I was cleaning up my kitchen, I moved a measuring spoon, and noticed a couple more little black dots….

I looked up at the shelving that holds all my jars of flours and rice and…

Yeah, that little black thing I was convinced was a horrific bug?


What had I added to my breakfast smoothie moments before discovering that little black speck on my ear? Chia seeds.

Hi, my name is Liane, and I have an overactive imagination.

On the bright side, my house is sparkling clean and sheets freshly laundered. Twice.

10 Comments leave one →
  1. hikerchick permalink
    August 29, 2010 11:42 pm

    OMG- Fall down laughing funny!!!!!!!!!

  2. August 30, 2010 3:10 am

    Hehe, oh girlie! I’m glad it was just a chia seed playing a trick on you…. 😉

  3. August 30, 2010 4:57 am

    Hahaha! Well, at least you got a clean house out of the deal!

  4. August 30, 2010 7:25 am


    This is so Abby.

    Oh my gosh I love you so much.

  5. August 30, 2010 8:20 am

    Bwahhhahhhahhha! OMG that is classic! You can come freak out at my house anytime. My cabinets need a good wipe down.

  6. Leah @ Why Deprive? permalink
    August 30, 2010 11:16 am

    hahaha that is the best thing I’ve heard all day!!

    Its ok though, I cleaned my whole house after having a dream that a spider was running at me while I was laying in bed.

  7. August 30, 2010 12:30 pm

    Hahahahaha oh no!!!! Well at least now your house is sparkling 🙂

  8. August 30, 2010 10:26 pm

    I just retold this story to my husband and got the giggles so bad I could barely finish. Thanks for the great laugh!

  9. August 31, 2010 1:53 pm

    Seriously. Post of the week. Hands down.

  10. September 3, 2010 10:10 am

    It’s pretty difficult to get an actual LOL out of me, and a loud one at that, but you totally did. Oh, chia seeds. This is right up my alley. You are not alone with the imagination being a little ahead of itself.

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